Friday, May 16, 2008

The Faithfulness of God

Sometimes, things happen that remind you of the faithfulness of God and the fact that he is alive and very much interested in our everyday lives. I still don’t always get why but God is still involved in all of our lives. Now, I am not referring to feel good nature stuff like, oh, the sunset on the beach, the glorious mountains in the Alps or even the beauty of new life in that of a newly born child. I am talking of when God meets you when you need Him but aren’t expecting Him. He may not solve your problem at the moment but He comes and reminds you that yes, He is still involved.

Moses never made it to the promise land but at every “darkest hour” the faithfulness of God was evident even when his wasn’t. What am I talking about? Well, yesterday, in the midst of my own personal and selfish storm, my lack of faith became evident to me. But that was before I popped in over at Pop Dan’s on my lunch break just to check on him and maybe cheer him up. For the next 40mins, God spoke to me in clear and concise terms through Pop Dan and for a good portion of that time, tears simply flowed.

Many of you know that I am not an overtly emotional guy except when anger is involved but this was different. Pop Dan doesn’t know what is going on and still doesn’t know but nothing he said was off point, nothing. Before I went to bed two nights ago, I had written a sentence in my personal journal (not going to share what it is). It was a simple sentence but straight to the point. I think God read it and led me to Pop Dan (a decision I made yesterday). I thank God for a couple of things…1. His faithfulness is beyond comprehension. 2. I thank God for moms, dads, grandpas and grandmas for answering the call of God to be prophetic and to pour their lives into people like me.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Some Days I wonder

These last few days/weeks/months/whatever have been...well, lets say the sunny days have been few and far between. Too many things going on personally and in the lives of people that I care about. I know I tend to mask things really well on the outside but the mind games, the mental struggles eventually get to me. If only life were like a game were you could call a timeout in the bad stretches so you can regroup and get back out there.

Somehow God prepares us though for the days ahead because before the tough times come, he know how tough it is going to be. That's why words that were prophesied four years ago can still be and are still relevant today. The truth is that no matter the situation on the ground, He still is speaking if I would only listen. It's like when Elijah was running from Jezebel and God's angel woke him up a couple of times to feed him to prepare him for the rough days ahead.

I wish my thoughts could come out in English, but often times and certainly more than not, I feel it but I can't speak it. I wrote this poem almost exactly two years ago...seems like something I just wrote...

Some days I wonder

Some days I wonder what
What’s the point?
What am I still doing here?
What am I living for?
What the heck is going on?

Some days I wonder why
Why is life so difficult?
Why should I care?
Why don’t I care?
Why I am still here?

Some days I wonder who
Who really cares?
Who do I really live for?
Who would notice?
Who needs help?

Some days I wonder how
How long I can go on
How much longer I have
How He did it
How it affects me

Everyday, He knows
He knows what
He knows why
He knows who
And He sure as heck knows how